Prostitution is Torture

I have been asked to write about my experiences of torture, and this post is a start to exploring that.

I believe the whole structure of prostitution is founded on torturing the prostituted class – and when it is not sadistic, that is almost unimportant.

The structure of all forms of prostitution is designed to make the prostituted have no access to the language of no, it is a designed to give the prostituted no real access to safety, it is designed that the prostituted are stripped of their humanity and made into sex goods.

That is why we must see and know that it the system of prostitution that allows and makes invisible the everyday torturing of the prostituted.

There is a fundamental that makes it clear how it is torture, and how effective the prostitution profiteers and punters make it invisible.

Most so-called sex in prostitution is rape or abuse, but by re-branding as consensual by the exchange of goods or money – then the rapes/sexual violence disappeared.

But to have to have sex with many strangers, most of whom will want to do violent sex acts, most of whom will have contempt for just coz you are a prostitute, most of whom think and know they treat you no respect or dignity – that is torture.

I became numbed to “ordinary” rape, and only remember the extreme sexual torture – for I like most of the prostituted, was raped so many times it was my norm, and made give up believing in hope.

What is hard for many exited women is speaking to the depths of pain, horror and grief of what is was to be raped so often and so violently that we lose the language of rape.

It is hard to listen and hear how often sympathy will gather round women and girls who are raped once or three times – we find hard to know where to place.

I have learnt to say the right things in the rights places, as my prostituted soul is screaming that was my norm, that was what I was – no-one will hear that scream.

So exited and prostituted have learnt to scream in silence, and on occasions to rage to each other.

Who is holding the prostituted woman or girl who is raped and bleeding, but has to tidy enough for the next punter to rape her.

That is torture shut away from the public, shut away from any show of sympathy.

And rape is just the everyday business of being a prostitute.

Many if not most punters pay to do whatever they want to the prostituted.

Profiteers sell as much access to sadism as possible to have variety in the market.

The prostituted are made so sub-human, that it is considered fine to experiment with her body and mind to see how pain and degradation she take – hopefully without actually dying.

Though if the prostituted are so inconvenient to die or be too sick to be fucked any more – that is no problem, for the prostituted are replaceable and so can be thrown away.

That is an environment of torture.

But most important, all forms of torture can and are placed in the minds and bodies of the prostituted – but because most of the prostituted are women, because it is framed as the private sphere, and because many have decided it just sexual entertainment for men – it not viewed as important.

I remember when water-boarding was all the news – the horror that male soldiers and civilians could be degraded so, and place inside so much terror.

I then found words for what done to me by some punters.

I found word to describe having my head forced into the bath water as I kneeled by it.

Only it was more than just drowning, no punter want just physical torture – there must be sex, they must get their money worth.

I was anally raped as I drowned – but not to kill, just a game to push me to the edge of death.

It is the same with gang-rape, which is the norm in all forms of the sex trade.

Gang-rapes only seemed to matter when done outside the frames of the sex trade.

Gang-rapes is normal in most wars, but it often inside army brothels – so it is made invisible or just a way for men to de-stressed.

But if many civilians are gang-raped, especially if it is men, there is deep shock and horror, and campaigning for change.

It is the same with gang-rapes of young women.

It is normal in internal trafficking that teenage girls are seasoned into prostitution by being gang-raped on a regular basic.

This is hidden, it is made that it must be consensual for she took the money or goods, it must be consensual for she came back to the same violence several times, oh, it must be consensual for whores don’t care what happen to them and they like it really.

But when non-prostituted teenage girls are passed around and gang-raped, it then become a society’s issue, and a sign that we do not care about young women.

I suppose if I saw UN or police raiding all aspects of prostitution where it is known torture is going on, I may think society is seeing the reality of what it is to be prostituted.

But, it is usual that punters know they do any sadism to any prostitute in any place with consequences or punishment.

The torturing of the prostitute has become so normal that it no longer seen.

It is invisible.

7 responses to “Prostitution is Torture

  1. It never occured to me what it was until I spoke about it in counselling. That very specific way in which pimps and punters put you through hell, physically, just to see your response, just because they can, and because it makes them feel big to do so. Oh, and it keeps you in line. The woman I was speaking to said she’d only heard things like that from women who’d been in prison camps in civil wars. And then I felt guilty, because I hadn’t suffered that much…

    It’s easier to recognise it when other people speak about it happening to them. As you wrote, we internalise and silence it when it happens to us – there’s no way out, so it just gets ‘forgotten’ inside, ignored. We lose all concept of these things ever happening to us. But when we see it happen to others…

    That’s why I was so upset when I read the story of the gang rape case in France, and how up in arms everyone was. My first reaction was sickness, because I remember that happening, I remember how helpless I felt, knowing there was no way out and I couldn’t tell anyone for fear of how they’d judge me. And then…yeah, you realise that people are paying attention because the victims are so-called ‘normal’ girls. If we’d gone to the police they’d have laughed in our faces. I’ve reported rape and been flat blank disbelieved by the police. Yet a ‘nice’ girl who’s 19 and never had a boyfriend? They’re out with teams of forensics, searching the local park and questioning everyone nearby. The double standard is so evident. It just helps us to internalise the pain even more. Well, it must’ve been something we did to deserve it, right? Or maybe it wasn’t that bad.

    It’s either our fault, or we’re disbelieved. For no reason other than it’s convenient to do so. Hell, we’ve only really been taken seriously reporting rape if we’re sweet innocent 19-year-olds since the late 1980s. It feels like the tide is turning somewhat, but it’s turning so slowly, and so many people are still being hurt and ignored :(

  2. You know, you have been changing my life in telling your Truth, as have other prostituted women who I’ve had the honor of knowing and/or reading (including you Blu, I really appreciate your comments).

    I hear your screams loud and clear and cry and rage with you. I can’t imagine a worse hell….and then normalized and silenced and made invisible on top of it??!! WOW. I also see how this makes ‘regular’ rape pale in comparison. I can’t even imagine this torture that you speak of, though I get a small hint of it through your words. I try to imagine it though, because I have to, because if this is done to other girls/women, it’s being done to me because it’s only a matter of luck that it hasn’t been done to me, and luck is no excuse to look away and leave it for others to deal with. EVERYONE needs to be dealing with this, not only those who suffered it.

    “no punter want just physical torture – there must be sex, they must get their money worth”

    I’ve been thinking that PTSD among the prostituted is a very different thing than that among war vets because of the intimacy involved, making it a different/deeper thing than ‘just’ physical torture or combat trauma. Iyanla Vanzant says that intimacy = IN TO ME SEE, and what you describe of the punter/torturers is to see – so personally – the worst of human Spirit death/decay which is being inflicted onto and into the prostituted over and over and over.

    My heart goes out to all who have suffer/ed at the hands of these men’s deadened hearts & souls as I think about how humanity got to this place and how we get the hell out. In doing so I am asking feminism’s favorite question: What about the men?! :p I personally prefer to hang with and listen to the women, but it feels to me like the men need some very close scrutiny since they are the ones creating all this destruction; scrutiny that goes beyond law and order responses, which don’t tackle the (lack of) heart of the matter.

    You always leave me with so much to think about. Thank you for what you are doing here, the impact is beyond measure.

  3. It is beyond painful to imagine these horrors of torture. That is one of the reasons so many people do not know – it hurts to know. But I thank you from my heart for writing this. You have widened my understanding and compassion. I have always believed that prostitution must be hell, and what you write confirms that belief. You have had the courage to share your nightmare, and so you have increased awareness. I thank you, from my heart. I also offer you a hug of comfort.

  4. When I first came across your blog, I was reading an Iraqi woman’s blog at the same time. Your post and Blu’s comment could easily be her description of Abu Ghrab prison… Pushing a body to point of death, stripping people of humanity, sensory deprivation and yes gang rapes. In fact it was more than once she equated what happened with pornography. The horror is obvious yet no one talks about it.
    Great post and comment from Blu, hugs to you both xox

  5. Pingback: Sex Trade Survivors & Abolitionists are the Heartbeat of My Feminism « The Feminist Rag

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