I have said elsewhere in my blog that I believe in the abolition of prostitution. I would see as a step-by-step process, but I see no need for any man to pay for sex.
The most important thing is the safety and dignity of prostituted women and girls, not whether a man can have readily available fuck-objects.
I am sick of being told about the women who are happy being paid for sex.
Of course I know they exist, but they are a very tiny minority.
Also their happiness is built on an industry that is prepared to torture, mentally abused, rape, batter, murder millions of women and girls because they are framed as “wanting it”.
Oppression that appears endless is very hard to resist. It is simpler to adjust to it in order to survive.
I adjusted to prostitution by learning to be “happy”, learning to perform as if it did not matter.
I adjusted by losing my self.
I understand thinking there nothing wrong with prostitution. I understand blocking the ugly side, and thinking that I had power, that the money was good, that maybe I would men that respected me.
I would of not survived if I had known my reality.
How can one mind cope with all power was taken away from me. That my opinions, my life outside of prostitution, my hopes, my essence was of no importance
How could I know I could stop the violence. I said no so often, but that word had no relevance. I fought them off, and it seen as funny.
How could I know I was not seen as a human, just a replay of the porn in their heads. How could I see they only saw me as targets to be fucked.
Where the hell is the dignity in that.
But I would say I defenced being prostituted then. It was my choice, only prudes were against it.
As for radical feminist making me against prostitution, that is the most patronising nonsense. Although I respect radical feminists coz they seemed the only group to be prepare to see abolition as an aim, not just tinkering at the edges.
I was made against prostitution because of my life in it. As I saw who I had become, I choose to resist without reading or meeting any radical feminist.
It was my mind and fierce will to survive that made me hate that men feel entitlement to rape, batter, verbally abused, sexually torture and murder women and girls just because they labelled as prostitutes.
My anger from friends I know. My friend who committed suicide after one too many sadistic john. A friend traumatise after doing three years of “safe” high-class escorting. A friend had enough of men throwing her out of moving cars coz they were too cheap to pay.
My anger is from every rape I lived through. Every time I had yet more sadistic sex forced into my body. Every time I had to smile when in terror and/or agony. Every time I fake orgasm hoping then the john would stop.
I don’t need to read Andrea Dworkin to be angry. I don’t need to read Melissa Farley to know PTSD.
After all it is embedded in my body.
But it is nice to have a language that expresses what is already there.
So, I will a small part of the fight for abolition.
For I believe prostitution is a massive abuse of the prostituted women’s and girl’s human rights to safety and dignity.
I say to the few women that “enjoy” being prostituted, your enjoyment is on the bodies on many tortured women and girls.
I really don’t care what you do in your private lives. But do not part of an industry that is giving men’s permission to treat prostituted women and girls as sub-humans.
Prostitution make it fortune by giving men permission to hate and degrade women and girls.
Of course there will “nice” johns and women who have chosen. But in the end, they are being used by the sex industry to say there is no real harm in prostitution – only women and girls who made bad choices.
Only it seems to me round of 98% of women and girls are unlucky in prostitution.
I put women and girls who are torture, raped, battered and murdered before the “happy hooker”.