The main barrier to being truthful about my experiences of being prostituted is language, and how it is used to lessen the horror.
I would not mind if this was just me as an individual, but it all women that exit the sex trade will have their realities made invisible by the language of euphemisms that surround their experiences.
For instance, prostitution is placed into the language of empowerment, liberation and the language of leisure.
It is not placed into the language of human rights. It is not placed into the language of slavery.
No, that would be extreme.
But, I placed inside the language of human rights violations and slavery, for I know the conditions I survived. I know that I was a lot better off than many prostituted women and girls.
But what do you call being raped day in day out.
What do you call a place of work that cut you off from all contact with the outside.
What do you call punishment that include gang-raping, forced to re-enact hard-core porn and the threat of death.
What do you call working in a brothel where you are only allow out if escorted.
What do you call private parties where johns pay for extras of sadistic sex knowing they do as they want – for none of them will be punished.
These are just the tip of ice-berg, for in the sex trade whatever sick porn fantasy a john has will be catered for.
Is this not a complete abuse of the prostituted woman or girl right to be safe. Right not to be battered. Right not to be raped. Right never to have to worry about murdered.
How can it not placed into the language of slavery, when women and girls are passed around like sacks of sugar in the sex trade.
Prostituted women and girls lose their chance to remember they are fully human as they made to perform as sexual objects in many environments.
A common ploy is to work the goods so hard, have constantly having degrading and often violent sex, in order that the woman or girl become a machine that only can give out sex.
All the rest of her existence, her dreams, her world before, the idea there could be any future and any spark of life, that is unimportant to the sex trade.
No, the ideal prostitute has no existence except as a cash cow for the sex trade.
Damn that sure as hell feels like slavery.
But then I am extreme.
Language matters when speaking of the places that prostituted women and girls are made to work.
Many brothels are not named brothels. They called private parties, massage parlours, even a business arrangement.
But then, there is also the romantic view of brothels.
I as a jazz lover, get mightily sick of the sanitised view of brothels that jazz portrayed. It seemed that in brothels that only “naughty” sex happened, and the men treats the prostitutes with loads of respect.
It is hides the violence, or if spoken about just “bad men” that will be banned from brothels.
I could cry at this upside-down view of what brothels are. What indoors prostitution is for the majority of prostituted women and girls.
Violence is the norm in indoors prostitution. Violence with no redress.
Violence that becomes so common that that the prostituted woman or girl will survive by deadening all emotions. She will survive by losing the ability to know pain.
Degradation is the norm in indoors prostitution.
It is degrading to have to re-enact whatever porn fantasy the john carries into the body of the prostituted woman or girl.
It is degrading to put the happy face and fake orgasms in order to be safe and lessen the pain. It is degrading to act happy when part of you wants to run away or die.
Don’t call it brothels – maybe say sex farms, maybe say something that mentions forced next to sex.
Don’t use language that is nice – when a whole mass of women and girls are being raped, sexually tortured and thrown away.
Hell, use the language of factory farming, use the language of torture, use the language of demanding basic human rights. Don’t be nice.
It is far too late to be nice.