I have been in a very bad way, and at times like this I fall into music.
I need music to quiet, I need it to scream.
I need music to enter my brain with its intelligence, I need music to be so wild my brain switching off.
I need music to find joy in my past, I need music to show I have a future.
I need to reject music that take to places I was nearly destroyed, I need to have my own taste in music.
I need to know how music was used to make me compliant, I need music to give me the strength to be defiant.
I need music to be there to close out all other senses, I need to music as loud background as I write this blog.
Music made this blog.
Music force life back into my body.
Music give me nuggets of joy reminding me I was human.
God, music has been in the whole of my life – but now I can let it in without fear or just using to close down.