I do not make New Year’s resolution, it quite a silly tradition.
Instead I believe each day should matter, each day is part of my battle to go forward, to make myself into a full human being.
January the first is just another day – colder than others, but it means no more or no less than any other day of the year.
Only, in English cities there is a stillness that is so rare.
I walked through Manchester today and noticed so few cars, few walkers.
It is a time where there is space to reflect, time to allow in feelings, to know that I am alive.
So, I do not make resolutions, only to break them in a week or so. But, I do say I want next year to count.
I am very happy about Clause 14, but it is just a start of changing attitudes about prostitution in England.
We are a long from prostitution being as the human rights issue for the women and girls that are in the sex trade.
We still live in a society where prostitution is placed into the frame of choice, liberty, self-determination, freedom and always fun.
Many make the choice to frame prostitutes as sexual outlaws, a term that has little or no meaning, but hell it sounds so cool.
Most who speak of prostitution in these terms would never do whoring themselves – or they do pretend prostitution with safe men they know will never mentally or physically harm them.
They speak of freedom and having choice – and turn their backs on the vast majority of prostituted women and girls.
It would inconvenient to see and know that the sex is built on the torture, degradation and brainwashing of those women and girls.
That messy truth might ruin their sexual fun.
Well tough, prostitution is sexual slavery for the vast majority.
Prostitution is not about sexual freedom, or being a sexual outlaw.
How can it be when the john is paying for the right to do whatever he wants. How can it be when the sex trade turns out women and girls who cannot say no, cannot care about losing their right to dignity, lose their right to safety.
How can you be free when you turn into a sub-human to be fucked, to be called names, to be beaten, to place into porn scenarios and to be thrown away.
If you turn your back on those conditions, you are part of the destruction of millions of girls and women just so johns can get their precious orgasms.
If you want this year to count, stop turning your back on these women and girls.
They no different from you – only maybe more things have gone wrong in their lives.
Becoming a prostitute is very easy – leaving can be impossible.
And for those of us who were lucky enough to exit and stay alive – we live with the shadow of extreme trauma in our lives.
This year, I want that trauma to made more real and solid, so it no longer be ignored.
No longer can the term – prostitution is mostly harm-free – go by, without trauma being placed on the table.
Those who choose to claim that prostitution is harm-free, know in their heart they are lying to protect men.
Is it harm-free to be penetrated on and on and on and on and on and on.
Think what that does to the vagina. Do you not think it will be torn, will be bruised. Will go so numb is cannot know “normal” sex.
Think how that will only survivable if you go completely detached – which often means being unable to know how to keep yourself safe.
And know for the vast majority of prostituted women and girls being penetrated vaginally becomes nothing, it so bloody common. It is nothing when johns use so much more sexual violence.
Is it harm-free to be nothing but a porn-toy for johns to use.
Porn never shows tearing, bleeding, going unconscious (unless that is the “plot”).
The fear in porn is just there as a come-on. Porn has women and girls loving being dominated and degraded.
Porn has bodies that always cum on command.
Porn destroys all it touches – but lets pretend it is just fun.
To be a prostitute, you must get used to being made into porn.
Don’t complain if they fuck in every hole in your body. Don’t complain if they beat you up and fuck you. Don’t complain about choking on their penis. Don’t complain if they call you whore, slut, filth – whilst saying look you love it really don’t you.
Don’t complain – learn to smile and to tell how great they are.
That is never harm-free.
How can it be harm-free if you made to love being raped, love sexual torture, love being made into scum.
How that destroy your mental welfare.
I want this year to count that we see the prostitute as a full human – not just some cardboard cutout that fits your preconceived ideas.
See the human – than you can feel her pain, her grief, her desire for a future and her life is so much more than that word “prostitute”.
If I do anything this year, I want to show the human face of prostitution.