I have been writing this blog, often feeling I am writing into a hurricane.
But I find that is not true, instead my words are going into a silence.
A silence of the many women who have survived being prostituted, and are left with no language to express their truths.
I hope and, by god, I prayer that my few words, and my struggle to discover my truths give some expression to that time.
It is a silence of many centuries of the prostituted having their language stolen from them.
When you think you know the lives of the prostituted – know it is usually filtered through other voices.
It is the voices of johns. They may make it in novels, arts, wall paintings, films, or just the myth of how to become a man.
Johns will place the prostituted on a pedestal, or say over and over and over how they are the scum of the earth.
Johns paint the prostituted woman as sex-crazy, the woman who teaches him how to fuck or introduces to exciting sexual practices.
Johns will say endlessly how he was manipulated and treated badly by the whore, how she control his mind and dick.
Johns have always lied and always will lie about the prostituted.
But, their word had become the legend – so fucking print the legend.
We get the language of academics and other professionals telling us the truths of the prostituted.
Academics who know little or nothing about the realities of being a prostituted woman – tell us how safe our lives would be if only they were more regulated and made legal.
Academics speak the language of pimps, as they promote indoors prostitution, say the violence is mainly there because prostitutes are stigmatised, little mention of inconvenient male violence from johns and profiteers.
These academics are follow closely by health practitioners speaking of handing out condoms, of regular health checks of prostituted women who will always in indoors prostitution.
By politicians who speak of making it safer by legalising prostitution – not mentioning how it would be great for gathering taxes.
Prostitutes are analyse, made into statistics, use as a warning to normal women – but never given their own voices.
Maybe it has been decided that the prostituted is too stupid to speak for themselves. It sure as hell feels like that, as these so-called experts speak for us, and send us back into hell.
They can be detached – for the prostituted are just numbers to them.
Then much of the so-language of the prostituted is the words of the profiteers of the sex trade. Their words will drown out any small whispering from the prostituted.
It is the sex trade that invented the happy hooker, the concept that indoors prostitution is safe and a money-spinner, that it is just sex work, that some managers treat their girls with care, that it all about independence and rebelling, that most freely choose to do it, that any violence is only coz of stigma and dodgy establishments – not coz the sex trade might profit from allowing sadism to be its norm.
The silencing of the prostituted is smashed into her by the constant brainwashing of the sex trade.
She is made to believe she is sex-mad, that she wants violent sex – coz if she could walk any time, and normal women would not do what she does unless they enjoy it really.
She is made to believe that any sexual practices or mistreatment is a mistake, some bad apple who slip through the system. Only the violence increases, the bad apples outnumbered the good apples. She comes to believe she is asking for it.
She believe that all punishments are deserved – she is just a filthy whore after. Punishment of her manager raping her, punishment of him passing around special clients. Punishment of being away from where she lives, into more violence and degradation. Even she would feel it her fault if she was murdered.
She believes that her only role in life is to be a fuck-toy – all the rest of her existence is of no importance.
Now, tell me how do you break that silence.
I do my bit – but it take a force more than just exited women to destroy the lies of johns, professionals and the profiteers of the sex trade.
It needs the non-prostituted to stop believing the lies – and start bringing forward the voices of those who have survived prostitution.