I have decided one way to move trauma is to express anger. Not just any old anger, but the anger of the exited woman who kept silent too long.
My anger is connected to exploitation of the prostituted class from all centuries, from cultures I may not know, and the rage grows every time man-made excuses are found for prostitution to continue.
There are no excuses left for sexual slavery – it is not it must her choice; it is not it part of old tradition that most have forgotten the origins; it is not just dirty work someone must do; it is not that some women or girls were just born to be whores; it is not just fun or burlesque ; it is not some kind of equal business exchange; it is not something to just clear off the streets, or get rid of the violently trafficked and clearly under-aged prostitutes – then heck everything will be fine.
Stop lying to yourself, stop making the choice to turn away from the ordinary violence and hate that is inside the whole of the sex trade.
Whilst you are having debates, writing articles or just chatting on why some prostitution ain’t that bad really – whilst you do that, prostituted women and girls who you have decided do not fit the “victim-prostitute” label, are being worst than silenced.
They become the prostitutes that punters know they can do any violence do, knowing if they say – look she enjoy it really – society is more than willing to believe the word of a liar, rather than question what is done to the prostitute.
I so angry the only most prostituted women and girls survive knowing that they have no rights to safety or worse knowing most outsiders think it her choice, she not real violence.
Sorry, I know many want to say this is not true – but my experiences of rape when I was inside the sex trade, is even when was so brutal I was close to death – it was never named as rape by those in a position to help me or give me justice.
I was raped in ways that not subtle ways – no I was in hospital with such brutalised anal rape that a doctor thought I should stay for at least two nights. Only for the nurse to shout in a crowded room –
“Whores like you, waste of the NHS time”
Then sew up my anal injuries without bothering with anesthetic – nice.
I had little or no support for all bashing ups, all the internal injuries, no questioning of why I brought the morning-after pill so often – if others think it might be prostitution, their instinct is turn away and then invent it must be her choice, to make themselves feel better about themselves.
That just pisses me off.
Once others decide that the prostituted have chosen their lifestyles – then they very quickly only see what they want to be liberating; questioning old-fashioned morals; quick money; way to meet powerful men and so many other very dangerous myths.
Well, I and many exited prostituted women who did indoors “high-class” prostitution wanted so much to believe those myths as well, we wanted to be safe; we wanted that rich men respected us enough to see we were human; we wanted to have some control in our lives.
We never got it – but others continually tell us how brilliant it was.
Said by people who have never been trapped in a flat or hotel room with a man rich enough to keep you for days, weeks or months. This man owns you, so his violence is just his entitlement – in that environment a rich who may have access to any hard-core porn can and does use the prostitute’s body as his personal porn playground.
That is the reality for many escorts, many brought girlfriends – that reality is sent into silence.
Rich men from any cultures are always more important than the prostitute.
I may write more some other time, I am burnt out now.