The Greatest Cut of All

Dedicated to Rebecca Whisnant – who deeply inspired me to dig harder.

 

The thing that is the hardest to face and look into the heart of – is the pain of the humiliation and degradation which becomes your norm as a prostitute or in any other aspect of the sex trade.

I listen to Rebecca Whisnant’s wonderful speech at the 2012 Stop Porn Culture conference, and she explain the pain in the heart of every prostituted woman or girl that I know, and far too many I do not know – the pain of what humiliation and degradation does to you.

This is pass over by most of those who have interest in “studying” the prostituted class – ignore for it is decided that the prostituted are not human enough to be truly degraded or humiliated.

Some may see and acknowledge the degradation – but always framed as the prostitute’s choice, see as part of her nature.

Some may view the degradation and say it wrong – but it always with us, it must be true that the prostituted class just get used to it and learn not to mind.

A few may see the degradation and scream for real change – but in the slowness of change get bored, and moved on to more movable issues.

All this is an abandonment of the prostituted class – it is ignorance, it is arrogance, it is the desire not to associated as or with the prostituted class.

It is the reinforcing that the prostituted class are sub-human, and so it is viewed as free choice and part of the adult entertainment industry.

The major point is never allowed yourself to know and truly feel what degradation and humiliation means to the prostituted class.

You may get an inkling by comparing with other forms of male violence – such as long-term domestic violence, such as long-term child sexual abuse, such as gang-rapes.

In those you are at the start of understanding the institutionalised humiliation and degradation of the prostituted class – you are getting to the deadness of emotions of the women and girls inside the sex trade.

But that is only a small part of understanding the trauma inside the prostituted class left by non-stop degradation and humiliation.

It must be known that with most women and girls outside the sex trade that are violently abused long-term – they are more than the role of the battered woman or the raped child – they are still viewed as full humans.

They are broken humans, they are humans who are trapped, they are humans who are ignored – but they may be to feel sub-human by their abuser, but not by society nor is it their role to be sub-human.

The prostituted class were invented to be the role of being sub-human – inside the sex trade women and girls are interchangeable, for all the prostituted are made one, are made nothing but goods for profits.

The prostituted are not given access or the right to be considered human – they are goods used for porn, goods inside any building where men paid to rape, goods brought on any street corner, goods got at by clicking the mouse of any computer.

The prostituted are never allowed to be human – as they are move round all aspects of the sex trade with no regard to their physical and mental welfare.

Imagine you are that woman – tell how you would remember you are human in that environment?

If you want to know the cold heart of the humiliation and degradation that is the norm of being inside the sex trade – let me tell how I as goods was moved around.

I used me as a small example – for my experience were nowhere as bad as the majority of the prostituted – but my experiences left me empty, and having to search to find my own humanity.

I started in sex clubs that provided sadistic prostitution in near-by flats, catering for punters who wanted under-aged prostitutes or to look under-aged.

There it was my norm to be gang-raped, it was my norm to have no exit as men lined up to fuck me or sexually torture me, it was my norm for it to be filmed for so-called amateur porn.

It became my norm to know what fashionable in hard-core porn films or magazines – say “Deep-Throat”, “joke” child-rape from “Hustler”, latest rape-murders in the news – for punters put into my body.

That is degradation and humiliation – that is mental, physical and sexual torture.

I was moved into escorting/girlfriend experience – still mainly sadistic.

The major difference was these punters were richer, felt more entitled – these punters had the mentality of a slave-owner, and all I was their property that will thrown away.

I will always say girlfriend experience was the most horrific aspect of the sex trade that I experienced.

It was pure humiliation – that was the only reasons punters brought women to be “girlfriend experience”.

It was about having punters who thought it was there right to dig into the prostitute’s brain and not to allow her any privacy.

One of the major way to survive the sex trade, is to give yourself a separate personality that is the role of the “whore” – a personality that is detached from your mind as much as possible, a personality that pleases the punter or sex trade profiteer enough that you stay relatively safe or at least alive.

Girlfriend relationship is used by punters to mentally abused so much that it breaks down that personality – and forces the private parts of the prostitute.

He will keep her for hours, weeks, months – depending on his status and amount of cash he will pay out.

In that time, he will break the prostitute mentally, physically and sexually.

He uses the torture plays of acting like he cares about her – then if she attempts to trust or show any vulnerability – he beats her up or sadistically rapes her.

He uses sleep deprivation – then ask endless questions about her family, her real name, what films/books she likes, what a “good” woman like you doing this for – all breaking her down so does truth from lies.

He will show her off as his girlfriend – then violently rape her if she relaxes too much.

That is a small part of being inside so-called girlfriend experience. Not glamorous – just hell.

I survived escorting – but I never how or why.

I was sold as the whore who did not mean pain, heck my tag-line it was only real sex was when it hurt.

I was sold as goods to be used and thrown – I was not in the imagined line of escorting where punters respected me – no most did not look at me or talk to me. My function was as goods to sexually tortured and thrown away.

I was nothing – I had no rights, I could not even imagine what it was to be human.

That is the reality of humiliation and degradation for the prostituted class.

We had to die to hang onto to life.

 

Advertisements

9 responses to “The Greatest Cut of All

  1. An utter horror. Not one iota of humanity at all. There are pimps/madams in the US going on national TV shows selling the ‘girlfriend experience” as something that the poor men need because women are too busy/disinterested/uncaring to provide for them at home.
    I wanted to hurl a brick at the screen when I was shown the clip.
    Thank you for telling the truth about the especially sadistic torture that prostituted women endure.

    Like

  2. “We had to die to hang on to life”, a very powerful statement. No- one should have to live like that, that’s unfair.

    Like

  3. “”It must be known that with most women and girls outside the sex trade that are violently abused long-term – they are more than the role of the battered woman or the raped child – they are still viewed as full humans.

    They are broken humans, they are humans who are trapped, they are humans who are ignored – but they may be to feel sub-human by their abuser, but not by society nor is it their role to be sub-human.””

    While I respect and concur with 99% of your truth, ON this, I have to say, you are dead wrong. And this IS a huge part of THE REASON that women in the sex slave [it IS slavery I won’t sugar coat it] industry are not viewed as humans, but it does NOT BEGIN with the Sex slave trade/industry,

    it begins Way beforehand. IF society thought women and girls outside the sex trade were Human, then tell me this,

    why is it, that these same so called ‘seen as human women’ IF they dare defend themselves OR try to defend their children, are put into prison with IMPUNITY to be raped and tortured there,

    and not one damn word other than what a few ambition whores who utilize the misery of untold thousands for a dollar/or prestige in their academic-legal world,

    is Said about them? NOT a one,

    and Why is that? Because they aren’t seen as Human either…and they are murdered and raped and tortured and brain killed in mental hospitals If they speak out

    with total impunity.

    In silence….behind dark walls, it is IN these walls, prisons, mental hospitals, that women OUTSIDE the sex slave trade and women INSIDE the sex slave trade, are THE SAME

    IDENTICAL THE SAME, TREATED THE SAME, CALLED NAMES THE SAME, MENTALLY BROKEN THE SAME, RAPED THE SAME, PASSED AROUND TO GUARD TO GUARD [BOTH FEMALE AND MALE] THE SAME

    AND NO ONE CARES–BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT HUMAN.

    it is Behind these walls, on those tables while electro shocked to lobotomy, in offices having to give account to the doctors of death of the rapes, abuses, etc., both adult and child females–in cells being anally raped until their colon comes out and then having to work for the private prison industrial complex–till they rot and die

    that women, females ARE THE SAME

    they are ALL prostitutes, whores, cunts, bitches, dogs, pigs, etc.,

    and they all die with the leg irons on, with no family usually [very rare exceptions], no sympathy, no names, burned in crematoriums, forgotten about…..with leg irons on still SLAVES even IN

    THE GRAVE.

    Those are not females considered HUMAN, and you’d be surprised at just HOW many of these females are in those places because they were beaten, raped repeatedly, by fathers, brothers, cousins, boyfriends, husbands, pimps, johns, etc., tortured, etc., or whose children were,

    and SOCIETY, INCLUDING MANY FEMINISTS, DON’T SEE THEM AS ‘HUMAN BEINGS’

    let me say, on This point, I will scream it from the rooftops….there are Victims who are just as dehumanized that are not in brothels, and its time we realize–that a woman doesn’t Become by society ‘sub human’ when she’s a prostitute…IT’s because ALL WOMEN are by society’s standards deemed as NON HUMAN FUCK TOILETS, is WHY WOMEN ARE FORCED INTO PROSTITUTION

    and why NONE OF US, ARE IMMUNE FROM THESE ABUSES,

    NONE OF US.

    Jane

    Like

  4. “I was moved into escorting/girlfriend experience – still mainly sadistic.The major difference was these punters were richer, felt more entitled – these punters had the mentality of a slave-owner, and all I was their property that will thrown away.”

    In February 2012 there was a media splash of a study into wealth and behavior that generated headlines like, “Upper class people are more likely to behave selfishly” and “Rich People more likely to Lie, cheat, and steal.”

    Will the people who say escorting is better other forms of prostitution because the johns are wealthier consider that study and its implications for prostituted persons? It’s uncommon to hear nowadays that domestic violence committed by low economic-class men is worse than when committed by white-collar abusers, but the reversed ‘escort vs hooker’ misconception over what’s actually the behavior of differing classed johns seems stronger than ever. As ever, money washes a man’s hands clean in the eyes of most people.

    Your words repeated as a truth-telling reminder:

    “I will always say girlfriend experience was the most horrific aspect of the sex trade that I experienced.”

    Like

  5. Jane, no person in the prevailing patriarchal misogyny is wholly human. Victims and perpetrators alike. So what we are disagreeing upon is the level of sub-human that is utterly intolerable. Can you see that?
    Non-prostituted women may suffer greatly. I know that I have. I have been abused, raped and vilified for the crime of being a girl, and later, a woman. Is it trauma? Yes. Was I prostituted? No. Although that is a miracle.
    What I know is that the trauma and torture suffered by prostituted women was meant for ALL women. We, the non-prostituted owe a debt of respect and honor to all prostituted women. What they have to say is important.
    Rebecca is not saying that non-prostituted women (especially those abused and raped) are treated wonderfully. She is saying that they are validated by other women as human enough to be regarded and helped. Prostituted women rarely have that validation.
    We are disagreeing social validation and levels of dehumanization. I believe Rebecca. And I respect her. While none of us women are immune from abuses, some of us received a level of social support that is not availed to very most deserving of that support, the prostituted.

    Like

  6. This is so important for me to read and continue to read and soak in the understanding to fuel a continual compassion and fuel for serving in every way I can. Thank you so much for sharing from some of the most traumatic of your experiences. My honor and humble appreciation, and admiration, are yours. Blessings from this man and his work to tirelessly serve and advocate for you and all you represent.

    Like

  7. That was the real killer for me too, the humiliation and shame. I could take the sex – I’d been raped from an early age anyway, was used to posing like girls did in porn. It was the name-calling, the being slapped around, kicked, spat on. Things like my pimp making it really obvious why he was picking me up from school. The way he’d saunter into the playground and beckon me away, freeling telling everyone I was going to work, to fuck a flat full of men. Being sent back to school after he’d wiped his cum on my school uniform. That sort of humiliation is what kills. When you then have to sit on the school bus and have every single person laugh at you, point, throw things, and spit as well. When you get pointed out on the street by people, and their older family members sneer at you and call you a whore. And no-one, not even social services or the local family planning clinic, will take you seriously as a human being. You’re just a troublemaker, you bring it all on yourself, you must like it really or you’d stop.

    The humiliation is so poisonous. It means everyone hates you, not just punters. That’s how we’re kept subhuman, that’s how punters can do what they want to us and other people don’t have to care. It makes me so sick. Am still terrified of people, even now. And they wonder why we end up with PTSD…

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s