I want to say to truly understand prostitution, please do not be over-reliant on facts and statistics.Know that most so-called facts round prostitution are propaganda from sex trade profiteers and their allies.
Statistics are often owned and controlled by that sex trade lobby.
That is why this blog will rarely speak to such simplistic language.
Another, and very important reason, to not use “facts” is to speak close to the language of extreme and long-term trauma. To the language of fragmented memories, the language where so much violence turns into small moments.
No, to understand prostitution from the centre of its rotten heart, we need to deeper than mere facts and statistics.
We need to know there are numbers and facts that all the exited know, but dare not speak out loud.
Those are the words that the sex trade lobby fear the most – for if even a tiny percentage of exited folks spoke to the scale of male violence that is prostitution – if they were even believed by only a few. That would the seed that would pull all the roots of the sex trade and it non-stop lies.
Say I, as a small example, was to speak out about numbers and facts – those that I scared to say out loud or write in plain speech.
Say I use this post to break a silence of fear of being turned away, fear of not being believed, fear of not remember in any clear way.
I know I was raped – raped so often that it cannot be named as rape, raped until my skin cease to protect me, rape until I thought I was a robot.
But I can never know how many punters rape.
I know when I hear other exited folks say they were by hundreds or thousands of punters, I am deeply saddened but never shocked or even surprised.
All I know is that my experiences of indoors prostitution, is that the vast majority pay to rape, usually I would rather name it as sexual torture.
I know I was gang-raped, I was raped in so-called normal sex, I was anally raped, I was raped to make porn, I was orally raped, I was raped and beaten up,
I know I was raped in flats, I was raped in clubs, I was raped in my own room, I was raped in a subway, I was raped in graveyard, I was raped in punter’s homes, I was raped in public toilets, I was raped behind pubs, I was raped in a haystack.
Those just the sexual acts and places that my mind allows me to remember.
So much is forgotten, or just kept locked away.
I know I raped until I was unconscious, I know I was raped so often in so many repetitive ways that many acts of violent fade into one.
I also know the human mind can only remember so much torture, until it to survive and still healthy must close.
So when I asked how many punters raped me – I have no answer, only the empty scream of the trauma of knowing what it to be raped beyond the language of rape.
This just a short post.