OK I am listening to Spotify, and Staying Alive came on, and the block in my brain slowly shook awake.
I am alive – do not know why or even how.
And now after many lifetimes of wanting to die – I am want to stay alive.
I am useless at taking care of myself, but the more I understand I want to stay alive, the more I find I can live inside my own body.
But if you want to speak to the harms of prostitution, then see how many exited women cannot live within their own skins.
Think of the realities that my body – just an example of too many prostituted women – went through, and tell me you would be detached and/or hate that body.
I hear the shock and tears for women raped once.
Rape is seen as a form of torture, as the worse thing a woman can go through.
But this appears to be true only if the woman is raped rarely, or has nothing to do with the sex trade.
Prostituted women who are raped by hundreds and thousands of men – are ignored, pushed away and made invisible.
Our rapes become the hazard of our job, a fault in our lifestyle, or just because we did not negotiate with the punter what we would accept.
We are raped till our bodies have no space left that could be private, we are raped into a state of blankness.
Imagine what it to be raped by so many punters that you cannot know how, so many that their faces all become one.
Imagine what you would feel about your body then?
It is common after just one rape, to not want sex, to blame your body for orgasms that may have occurred, to grieve how your body has been changed.
This is in all prostituted women after rape – but they have no time or space to feel, no support to speak to that feeling.
No, most prostituted women are just place into rape after rape after rape – until she cannot have any feelings left.
Then the rapes of the prostituted are made unimportant – for the prostituted woman is cold, detached, acting hard and appears to happy or not to care.
To the outside, she has become the Happy Hooker or the sex worker and no real harm has been done.
But all the rapes are stored in the bodies of the prostituted.
If the prostituted woman is lucky enough to escape, to live, to keep her sanity – then it will become extreme long-term trauma.
This trauma is made invisible or dismissed, but the multiple voices of exited women are fighting to show their trauma and say –
Here’s the harm – our bodies are the witnesses and evidence of that harm, our bodies contain truths that will destroy the sex trade if you truly listened.
We know that the harms of prostitution are not from stigma, not from the place it is happening in – we know that the source of all the harms done to prostituted is the male entitlement to buy and sell the prostituted.
It is with this entitlement that punters make the wrong choice to make it OK to buy another human for his sexual wants.
There is no human right to buy another human for male orgasms, no human right to invent a whole class of mainly females to made into sub-human sexual goods.
But punters believe it is their right.
It is with this entitlement that a punter makes a conscious and pre-planned choice to use violence on the prostitute. In doing this, he proclaiming that the prostitute is no longer to be considered as human, but consumable goods.
The framing of the prostituted as sub-human goods is how sex trade profiteers want it – how it becomes that the prostituted do not get raped, for they have no access to human pain, human fear or human grief.
To make the prostituted sub-human, it an effective way to deny all the prostituted access to human rights.
They cannot have the right to be free from torture – for torture only happening to full humans.
They cannot have access to freedom of expression – for to survive prostitution it becomes vital to be silent or speak the language of your oppressor.
They cannot have the right to freedom of movement – for the sex trade profiteers can and will move the prostituted to other aspects of the sex trade, move them from country to country, from street to street. All done to punish, disorient and fully control the prostituted.
They do not have the right to a family – the sex trade needs the prostituted to be isolated, the sex trade will deal with pregnancy on their own terms, and the sex trade makes human love hard to express.
And the prostituted do not have the right to life – the death rates for the prostituted is off the scale. Female prostitutes are thought to be killed at the minimum of 12 times more than women of similar age or background, though it more like about 20 times more likely.
Exited women know what it was to be sub-human – and now as they stay alive, they are fighting to make sure no human ever is treated that way ever again.
We fight for all the prostituted – for just one woman in a brothel is one too many, just one escort in fear of a punter is one too many, just one prostitute being exchanged from one aspect of the sex trade to another more violent aspect is one too many and so on.
One prostituted human in any country is one too many.
That is why we will never give up.
We stay alive to fight.