Eight Years

I have been writing this blog for eight years now – and still I am frustrated, still I see the prostituted are made into sub-human.

There have been some positive changes, but from the viewpoint of an exited woman, there has been too much support for the sex trade and its promoters.

I would cry bitter tears, but there is too much to do than wasting my tears.

I can cry when all the prostituted have freedom, are treated as full human beings and truly heard.

Till then, my fight will be relentless.

A major positive in these eight years, and the positive that means the most to me – is the growing multiple voices of exited women is all over social media.

When I started this blog, in England I was an isolated voice, with little or no support.

There were many exited women campaigning internationally, but we were rarely connected.

Thanks to groups like SPACE and STSU (Sex Trade Survivors United), exited are organising on an international level.

This gives us many powerful political voices, we speak out a deeply painful personal and connect our lives together making a loud abolitionist voice.

In these eight years, exited women have invented and rediscover ways to support each other – we are not afraid to face dark terrifying emotions and truths, for we are never alone again.

We can keep some of our pain and truths with our exited Sisters, giving us the strength and courage to fight for abolition.

We can find the language that fits our realities and our fragmented memories.

We can laugh at what others cannot hear or even see, our laughter is our route back into life and is our power-source.

And we can learn how to speak of torture knowing it under all our skins, speak to rape on an industrial scale seeing it our bodies we speak of, and speak for the disappeared and dead for they shadow us as we forge a better future.

All that has happened in less than eight years – but it built on the multiple voices of the prostituted in all cultures and over 4000 years.

Before all history of what it is and was to be prostituted was recorded by those who consume or profiteer from the sex trade.

Now, we are slowly beginning to re-write our history and testimonies to speak to being inside the sex trade and to be made sub-human.

I started this blog hoping my small voice would make some re-think or even act to make real change for the prostituted.

I am shocked and deeply honoured by the fact I read world-wide.

In these eight years, my readership comes from 177 countries – 49 from Europe, 49 from Arica and Middle East, 37 from Asia, 33 from the Americas, and 9 from Australia/NZ/Pacific Islands.

That is amazing, and I feel very proud.

I hope my words helps abolitionists everywhere, and reaches some prostituted women who feel trapped or abandoned, and gives strength to exited women.

But back to my frustration which is the backbone of my politics.

I am deeply frustrated and can feel quite broken by how loud the sex work movement is, and how in the eight years they keep saying the same things over and over.

Their words are made in gospel by the liberal media and academia.

It is easy to believe their propaganda – for it does not confront the male violence and dehumanising of the prostituted.

Rather it paints an image of Pretty Woman as all the prostituted – a woman who cannot be hurt, seems to be empowered, is able to go in and out of prostitution – a woman that does not exist.

She is rebranded as a sex worker – when before she was a temple whore, a geisha, a courtesan, an escort.

In this world of fiction, sex workers are usually Western middle-class white women who choose prostitution as a career or a hobby.

In this world of fiction, sex workers are empowered and can turn away violent punters, whilst being high earners.

This world of fiction is sick when put alongside the reality that exited women speak to.

We know there is no aspect of prostitution that can be made safe – for any punter can be violent whatever label is put on the prostitute he is consuming.

We know the more money a punter the more entitled he will feel.

This entitlement means he will think he owns the prostitute body, mind and soul. He is very likely to be a sadist, and to expect to have the prostitute over a long period.

So, to earn big in the world of prostitution is to be living inside torture and know at any moment you could murdered.

I an exhausted – so end for now.

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